WASHINGTON - Journalist Bob Woodward's latest book, State of Denial, drops the bombshell that former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger is back in Washington on a regular basis advising President Bush and Vice President Cheney on the Iraq war. While Woodward reports that Kissinger, 83, is beating the same tired drum he sounded in the Vietnam war -- that victory is the only meaningful exit strategy -- Kissinger, personally, has had an extreme makeover."I don't know how else to say this, but he's gone hip-hop," said Vice President Cheney. "He dresses like a gangsta rapper. He comes strutting into the White House boasting in rhyme about weapons, crimes and violence. It's a little off-putting and, frankly, pathetic."
Cheney recounted one recent visit to the oval office when Kissinger "rode the President unmercifully." Showing off the garish chains around his neck, Kissinger poked Bush in the chest and bellowed. "How you like my bling bling, chump? You my dog! I ain't dissin' you, chump, because you my dog." When an attractive secretary entered the room, Kissinger zeroed-in on her. "Look at dat -- man, she really wack."
Cheney took a deep breath. "Wow! I don't know what to say about that. But I would imagine that a real 'gangsta rapper' wouldn't know what that's supposed to be." Asked how Kissinger's former boss, Richar Nixon, would feel, Cheney sighed. "Let's just say that I bet there are rumblings from within a certain Yorba Linda [California] grave right about now."
