PITTSBURGH - The most recent Keystone Poll, released this morning, reveals that challenger Bob Casey has narrowed the gap between himself and incumbent Senator Rick Santorum in the race for the United States Senate. "It’s a virtual dead heat," said Professor G. Terry Madonna of Franklin and Marshall College. "The public can’t stand either one of them." The poll shows that both men are now equally reviled by a majority of Pennsylvania residents. "Nearly one hundred percent of registered television viewers across the Commonwealth are now drawing no distinction between either candidate," said Madonna. "For instance, when asked which candidate’s image would make you more likely to shoot out your television screen, the nearly unanimous answer was 'either one.'"
The professor said that one hundred percent of those surveyed admitted to punching, kicking, shooting, or bludgeoning their television set when forced to watch a commercial for either Santorum or Casey during their campaign.
Madonna also said he wasn’t surprised by Casey’s late surge. "Santorum started this race as a guy most people couldn’t stand. He had great stomach-turning recognition. But all along, Casey’s people kept saying just give our guy a chance. And it seems now that the people know him, they find him just as repulsive as the guy he’s trying to beat." Madonna added "That’s politics for you." The ever-coy Madonna refused to pick a winner. "Casey has all of the vitality of a day-old bagel, and Santorum just has the face that makes you want to punch him," said Madonna, adding, "This thing is going down to the wire."
