FOUND IN CITY PAPER PERSONAL ADS:

Hello Dudes. I am a 48 year old married male newly relocated back to town in the Penn Hills area. Have lived in DC for 16 years, and I need someone to show me how the town has changed since I last lived here. I am 6'1, 200 lbs and in shape. I am a fun guy who needs to stay in the closet, but if you rub my back, I’ll rub yours, and probably more. I like politics, intelligent design, and WWF wrestling. Discreet inquiries only. Ask for Rick. 412-555-2232.