PITTSBURGH - Steelers President Art Rooney II flew to Los Angeles yesterday to interview former bouncer and bodyguard to the stars Mr. T for the job as Steelers head coach. Mr. Rooney met with Mr. T on the set of his TV Land reality show, “I Pity the Fool.” Sources inside the organization said Mr. T’s gruff, no-nonsense approach and willingness to throw people through doors if they fail to discharge their duties to his satisfaction make him an ideal candidate for the position.
Speaking to reporters outside his trailer following a three hour interview, Mr. T. was brimming with confidence. He admonished members of the press to “quit with their jibber-jabber” and heed his words. “When Mr. T take the reins of this team, we gonna be somebody, or we gonna be somebody’s fool!” he bellowed. He scowled when asked to make a prediction for the next Steelers game against the Baltimore Ravens. “Prediction? Pain!” Mr. T, who did a brief stretch in prison following his conviction for impersonating a professional actor, said he hoped his criminal record wouldn’t keep him from working in the NFL. “Y’all know how strict they are about employing model citizens.” The interview of Mr. T meets the requirements of the league’s Rooney Rule, which compels all teams to interview at least one washed-up celebrity when a head coach position is open.
The search for Mr. Cowher’s replacement continues today. Mr. Rooney is scheduled to meet with New York Observer critic and bon vivant Rex Reed at his Upper East Side apartment this morning to discuss the Steelers coaching job.
