BIDEN APOLOGIZES TO MAYOR RAVENSTAHL, VAL PORTER, MR. CLEAN

PITTSBURGH - A spokesperson for Senator Joe Biden apologized today for Biden’s description of Pittsburgh ’s Mayor Luke Ravenstahl as “young and dirty.” The spokesperson said Biden was simply trying to spread his own appeal to young people, noting that “'riding dirty' is a good rapster thing, dude." According to a press release, “Senator Biden believes that perhaps a better word for 'young' would have been 'clean.'"

Biden also apologized to WDVE radio personality Val Porter, whom he called "a clean, young thing.” Biden called Porter to apologize. "I should not have called you a 'thing,'" he said. "I forgot my mom’s words to keep the 'thing' in my pants. I should have called you a fresh, young broad.”

Biden reportedly also called Procter & Gamble to apologize for publicly referencing Mr. Clean.