TEHRAN - President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, a card-carrying member of the Axis of Evil, said the Axis will hold a thirty-day open enrollment period beginning March 15th. Mr. Ahmadinejad made the announcement in a speech given yesterday morning at the Revolutionary Guards annual Pancake Breakfast.
“With the recent execution of one of our charter members, the former President of Iraq, Saddam Hussein, we now have an opening,” he said.
The Axis of Evil is an entity determined to destroy the United States. Members of the Axis meet three times a year to damn the United States and discuss ways to hasten her obliteration from the face of the Earth.
Axis of Evil members enjoy priority seating at all Anti-American rallies around the globe, as well as an automatic fifteen per cent discount at all Denny’s Restaurants.
Mr. Ahmadinejad said he hoped the trend by young people to turn away from traditional fraternal organizations like the Kiwanis, or Lions Club, wouldn’t keep interested sociopaths from getting involved in an organization like The Axis of Evil.
“That’s why we’re holding a mixer for all prospective members at the Baghdad Elks,” he said. “Jong-Il is going to be there. Castro said he’d be there, if his doctor will let him travel.”
President Ahmadinejad said the mixer would be “the largest gathering of people who hate America since the last Democratic convention.” Then he muttered, to no one in particular, “I hope I remember the secret handshake.”
