
Judge Flowers Conti has actually clarified my own situation for me. I do exactly what Mr. DeFazio is now permitted to do. I go to work, I go to church, and that's pretty much it. So it occurred to me . . . I must be serving a sentence of home confinement!
Now, you can imagine how surprising this revelation was to me, given that I haven't been convicted of anything. And, I note, Mr. DeFazio is permitted to retain his hefty county pension (which, I am sure he would tell us, he's "earned"), so he really doesn't even have to work. He can just stay home all day and watch sports on television and sleep while he serves out his "sentence."
If I ever commit a crime, I want Judge Joy Flowers Conti to sentence me. After all, I wouldn't want anything in my life to change.