Onorato Declares State of Emergency; Ravenstahl Declares State of Complacency

Mayor Luke Ravenstahl countered his intra-party rival County Executive Dan Onorato's declaration of a state of emergency after yesterday's flooding by declaring a state of complacency."The city and region have suffered a terrible blow. I say we all chill a little bit and just calm the hell down. It's water. Doesn't anybody around here swim?" the mayor declared during a City Hall press conference at which he appeared in a Hawaiian shirt, flip flops and a backwards baseball cap.

The mayor urged citizens to heed advice from newly appointed City Emergency Services director Jimmy Buffett. Onorato, in a conciliatory gesture, later telephoned the mayor to work out a compromise. The pair later said that, following yesterday's state of emergency, he would allow a two day state of complacency after which the two leaders agreed to resume the region's long standing state of ineptitude.