“We wanted to do something for our loyal female fans,” team president Art Rooney says. “But since Steely McBeam got such a negative reaction, we’re not going to use steelworkers for the squad.”SOUTH SIDE --- The Steelers are returning to their roots for their 75th anniversary, announcing today that a male cheerleading squad will make its debut at the next Steelers home game. The team had a male cheerleading squad called the Ingots in 1962, but it was disbanded after only one year.
The squad will be simply called The Men, a reference to Coach Mike Tomlin’s frequent use of “men” and “the men” for the current team. But don’t look for any steelworkers to be gyrating on the sidelines.
“With all due respect to our city’s heritage, the image of the steelworker is passé,” team president Arthur Rooney II said. “We’re going to assemble a squad of iconic men that represent the Pittsburgh of today. Each man in The Men will have his own costume and persona. It’ll be sort of like The Village People, but without the overtly gay references.”
Rooney said the five characters will be:
- The Mayor, complete with briefcase and a “Party On, Dude” t-shirt. The Mayor character will also be responsible for driving the squad’s SUV to games, concerts and bars.
- The Nerdy but Sweet Computer Geek. Steelers officials hope to cast a real Carnegie Mellon student or professor for this role.
- The Strong Safety with Hair with Long, Flowing Hair. “Troy [Polamalu] offered to play this role while the offense was on the field, but Dick LeBeau nixed it,” Rooney said. “Plus he was injured in the game with Arizona, so that probably would have affected his dance moves.”
- The Hostess Ho Ho Delivery Guy. The character will launch Ho Ho’s, Pittsburgh’s favorite treat, into the crowd. “We’re having a little trouble modifying hot dog launchers,” Rooney said. “The Ho Ho’s are shattering into little pieces of foil, cake, and cream. We’ll get it fixed, though. I think we just need to adjust the air pressure of the cannons.”
- Jackson the Elephant, well-known stud, by special arrangement with the Pittsburgh Zoo.
