HAMMERFEST, Norway – Puffing away on unfiltered cigarettes and speaking through an interpreter, Gunnhild Lugosi-Swayne described her 150-year affair with Santa Claus for the first time in public.
“At first, he was a little off-putting, being so fat and all,” she explained, “But, seeing him out of that red suit -- let’s just say the stockings weren’t the only things well-hung by the chimney with care.”
Lugosi-Swayne’s remote cabin, fifteen miles north of the Hammerfest, the world’s northern most town, has become Santa’s traditional “last stop” on Christmas Eve.
“Every year, I look forward to him taking out his sack and showing me his package,” Lugosi-Swayne said with her eyes all a glow, “After our gift exchange, we snack on the milk and cookies that he picks up along his route."
“At first, he was a little off-putting, being so fat and all,” she explained, “But, seeing him out of that red suit -- let’s just say the stockings weren’t the only things well-hung by the chimney with care.”
Lugosi-Swayne’s remote cabin, fifteen miles north of the Hammerfest, the world’s northern most town, has become Santa’s traditional “last stop” on Christmas Eve.
“Every year, I look forward to him taking out his sack and showing me his package,” Lugosi-Swayne said with her eyes all a glow, “After our gift exchange, we snack on the milk and cookies that he picks up along his route."
Asked if she is concerned about Mrs. Claus learning about the affair, Lugosi-Swayne chuckled, “I suppose you think all she does is bake cookies. Thousands of elves to take care of, one women -- you do the math.”
