WASHINGTON - Beloved cartoon icon Tweety Bird died this afternoon when President Bush devoured him in front of hundreds of reporters as he strolled to a waiting helicoptor.
At 2:32 p.m., Tweety Bird approached the president to shake his hand as he strolled on the south lawn of the White House. Bush suddenly grabbed the well-known yellow bird with his right hand and forced him into his mouth, leaving nothing but a puff of yellow feathers. Shocked onlookers reported that the little bird let out a yelp as the President chewed him. Tweety was killed instantly.
When questioned, spokeswoman Dana Perino explained, "Everybody's been telling the president that there's no way his approval numbers could go lower. He hates to be told he can't do something, so this was the result."
