(Neighborhood of Make Believe) - King Friday XIII, benevolent monarch who has ruled the Neighborhood of Make Believe for nearly forty years, will hold a news conference this morning to announce the formation of a gang task force to combat a series of random acts of violence in his kingdom. The task force is being established in response to requests from frightened Neighborhood residents. Lady Elaine Fairchild, sole curator of the Museum Go Round, a popular tourist destination known for its world-famous Hall of Boomerangs, said her place has been shot up twice in the past week. “It’s been hell sleeping at night, toots,” said Ms. Fairchild. “I hope Friday can get this thing under control.”
Daniel Striped Tiger, who retired to the Neighborhood after spending the last twenty years working for Siegfried and Roy, said he has noticed a change. “I grew up in this place. I never worried about getting stabbed or pistol-whipped when I was a cub.” Daniel said things began to change when King Friday decided to tear down Corn Flake S. Pecially’s Factory and build a casino. “That place just attracts the wrong element.”
Last evening, Ms. Henrietta Pussycat was assaulted while returning home from a visit with Dr. Bill Platypus. The suspect, described as a tall, white male wearing a cardigan sweater and sneakers, remains at large. A spokesman for the King said his royal highness declined to blame gamblers for the spike in crime, but vowed to restore law and order.
