"By hiring these socialist lackeys and commie-symp lickspittals, we will be better able to serve our loyal readers," said a Tribune- Review spokesman. "These muttonheaded popinjays, with their reflexive hatred of the free market and a strong America will be able to get the Trib to the doorsteps of our loyal, God-fearing American readers in a timely fashion."
The Block Bugler currently delivers The Wall Street Journal in a similar agency agreement which has become increasingly utilized throughout the newspaper publishing industry.
Part of a burgeoning newspaper empire, the Tribune-Review reaches an estimated 8 million homes in the City of Pittsburgh with an additional 42 million subscribers in Allegheny, Beaver, Butler, Armstrong and Yoknapatawpha Counties. The Bugler, published by a cadre of fascistic imbeciles who hew the corporate welfare line of such statist poltroons as Jim Rohr, has an estimated circulation of nine.
"We are looking forward to a long, fruitful era of cooperation with these economics-brainless ninnies," the spokesman added.