VATICAN CITY - In the most controversial edict of his papacy, Pope Benedict XVI called on Christians around the world to rise up and kill the publisher of National Geographic Magazine. The Vatican News Service released the Pope’s message this morning: “By publishing the so-called 'Gospel of Judas,' the National Geographic Society has committed a heresy. It has long been settled by Church scholars and theologians that Judas never could have written a Gospel. His penmanship was simply too lousy.” In another controversial move, the Pope also announced that he was immediately canceling his subscription to National Geographic. Benedict XVI, who sources say has been “in a bad mood” since he learned that Ron Howard was directing a film adaptation of Dan Brown’s “The Da Vinci Code,” said he regretted having “to have somebody killed,” but he said that Christians can learn from their Muslim brethren. “A calm, measured response to viewpoints or opinions that offend or provoke doesn’t seem to get us anywhere,” said Benedict. “Let’s see what a couple of good riots and a little mayhem will do.”
