BRADENTON, Fla - Bradleys Roadhouse, 22, third baseman for Double "A" minor league baseball team The Altoona Curve, has been accused by Major League Baseball of being part of a lucrative human trafficking ring that is believed to have smuggled hundreds of illegal immigrants from Mexico to Florida.
Roadhouse, who spent spring training this year at the Bradenton training camp of the Pittsburgh Pirates, is accused of personally transporting dozens of Mexicans across the border by hiding them in an over-sized cup supporter.
The smuggling ring started to unravel last week, however, when an illegal Mexican immigrant was rushed to a local Bradenton hospital by an anonymous man and later died. Officials concluded that Roadhouse was involved in the incident after the coroner's report listed the cause of death as a severe case of second-hand jock itch. FBI inspector Noah Swayne explained:"We put two and two together -- the jock itch, and the numerous reports we'd been receiving about the bulge in Roadhouse's pants."
In related news, Pete Rose is said to be taking bets on Roadhouse's cup size.
