MARY CONTURO OF SPORTS & EXHIBITION AUTHORITY REPLACED BY MAYORAL SPOKESPERSON DICK SKRINJAR

"THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THE CONVENTION CENTER," SAID SKRINJAR. "IN FACT, WE'RE GOING TO HOLD THE AUTO SHOW THIS WEEKEND, AND ANNA NICOLE SMITH, WHO IS ALSO FINE, WILL MAKE AN APPEARANCE. SHE'LL BE RIDING BARBARO, AND THEY'LL BE PULLING MAYOR O'CONNOR ON A SLED."