Test of Liechtenstein's defenses shows Liechtenstein has no defenses
ZURICH - Switzerland sent an elite commando unit into neighboring Liechtenstein today, abandoning decades of official neutrality. Swiss Army spokesman Daniel Reist at first claimed the incursion was an accident, but faced with skeptical reporters, he admitted Switzerland has designs on its neighbor's territory.
"We sent 170 soldiers over the border. In case they got caught, we worked up a story about them getting 'lost' in the dark. We even left the bullets out of their assault rifles to make it look like they were just training. But we were really testing Liechtenstein's defenses before the big invasion."
Officials in Liechtenstein said no one even noticed the presence of Swiss soldiers. Reist was incredulous. "How could they miss us? We were wearing our Vatican uniforms. You can see us in those get-ups more than a mile away. If we had known it was that easy to invade another country, we would have done it long ago. We might not even take guns with us when we go in next time -- I think a board with a nail in it would work with those people."
At the White House, President Bush declined to involve US forces. "We've got a couple invasions of our own to take care of, " he said. "Whatever the Swedes want to do is OK with me."
US intelligence officials believe the Swiss will invade Liechtenstein within a month. After consolidating power there, the Swiss are expected to take on other neighbors with weak defenses, including Luxemburg and France.