Dear Judge Peckham: I am a first grade teacher. My class and I were shocked, appalled and disgusted by the insult leveled at Mr. Rogers and our WWII vets by way of the memorial statue showing Fred Rogers holding what appears to be an FN FAL 7.62 mm NATO rifle! (Story here.) Doesn’t anyone know his history anymore? He should be carrying a 30.06 caliber Garand M -1 (or perhaps a .45 Thompson) – those were the guns that pushed the Huns and sons of Nippon back to Berlin and Tokyo respectively! Get it right – or we may well have another generation of young people with no appreciation for history and simple ballistics. -- Your fan (usually), Gladys

Dear Gladys: The gun's not realistic enough for you? Have you even glanced at the statue? In fact, the gun's the least of our worries. I don't know if you've noticed, but this so-called likeness of perhaps our most beloved Pittsburgher is caked with craggy-skinned scales and has more in common with The Thing from the Fantastic Four than Mr. Rogers. Accordingly, Gladys, I suggest that the sculptor could put the historically inaccurate gun to good use, first by taking you out with it, then by turning it on himself. -- Your friend, Judge Rufus Peckham