FIRST “FACE TRANSPLANT” PATIENT SLIPS OUT OF HOSPITAL WITHOUT PAYING BILL -- BECAUSE NO ONE RECOGNIZED HER

LYON, France - Seven days after groundbreaking surgery that gave an the unidentified 38-year-old woman the world's first partial "face transplant" at a northern France hospital, the patient quietly removed her bandages this morning, then she dressed and nonchalantly walked past receptionists, security guards and her own medical staff and strode out the front door without paying her bill.

Receptionist Velveeta Lugosi-Mendelbaum was one of the bystanders who did not recognize her. "I know what she looked like when she checked into the hospital -- she had sort of a blank look on her face, but maybe that was because she didn't have any nose or lips."

The Hospital intends to pursue her. "She owes us a lot of money, and I won't rest until I track her down," said chief surgeon Dr. Bernard Devauchelle. "I only wish I could remember what she looks like." Dr. Devauchelle explained that no one had the foresight to photograph her new face.

There is a one-in-five chance that the woman's new face "won't take," Dr. Devauchelle said. "If her body rejects the new face, she'll be very easy to find," he said. "Just look for the deadbeat with the nose dangling off her chin."

Short of that, however, Dr. Devauchelle said that finding her will be almost impossible. "Unfortunately, she'll just be another face in the crowd."